Written in the year 2000 over ten years ago . A piece that pushed boundaries and at the time when in my journey my mind was being stretched by so many variables such as job loss , parentals issues and personal struggles . It was a time of darkness . it was a time where i was really struggling with my own existence as a human being . I have talked of lower level emotions and this poem certainly touches those . there are more of my works to come . this is just a taste ,,, Bless you all …
Gary Darbyshire 20/2/2010
Where to Now God ?
I struggle choking back tears
Why is my life so cruel ?
What is it that God sees in me ?
In my existence I wonder why I be
Do I deserve the torture ?
Who am I really kidding , my words or my voice ?
Does God have meaning for me in the world ?
If he does . please show me God for I am confused with life right now
Like a fork in the road
I love my family though I’m struggling to show .
My heart cries out, where do I go
You show me now signs , just more tests
I love my wife she shelters my soul though
Even she isn’t with me when I m down
When I wonder what its is you have planned for my journey in life
Do your disciples feel I am wasting my time
Why do send your demons to haunt my mind ?
Have I disappointed you so much to be scorned ?
Just say the words I long to hear for I feel god that I will never hear !!
My life is a misery but I will try my best to serve you , so please God
show me some light , don't let me stop or give up my life , show me the way
back to your heart and tell my wife that i love here and I am deeply sorry and
that I do indeed care ….
Gary Darbyshire © 2000 13/11-